I have GMail. I use GMail a lot. GMail has some built-in spam filters. It’s rare, in fact, that an email makes it to my inbox offering to enhance or expand my body parts, or give me 10% of the Crown Prince of Nigeria’s money transfers, or anything of the like.

Every once in a while, I go into the spam folder to clean it out.

One thing about GMail is that it scans my mail for keywords, and presents relatively unobtrusive links on the pages based on what it finds. Things I might be interested in.

I’ve noticed that the links in my spam folder are downright scary. Not that it’s ads for Herbal V1@gr@, no. Somehow it’s worse:

French Fry Spam Casserole – Bake 30-40 minutes
Savory Spam Crescents – Bake 12-15 minutes or until golden brown
Spam Confetti Pasta – Preparation time 30 minutes

Without a word of a lie, those are the last three links that I’ve had. I feel like I have my very own version of James Lileks’ Gallery of Regrettable Foods.