Unpleasant realization

From the front matter of Steven Brust’s Firefly fan-fic(ish) novel (found via Scalzi’s Whatever):

For people who care about such things, the book was written in emacs on a box running Mandrake Linux, then I used OpenOffice to format it for printing. The final layout for online publication was created with Microsoft Word and Adobe Acrobat. People who care about such things need to get a life.

I got to the last sentence and thought, Aw, that’s me.

(Of course, when I read the first sentence, I thought, Good heavens, man, there’s One True text editor, and that’s vi. Go go gadget :%s/]*>//gi .

It would seem that I’m a nerd.)

I'm such a slacker

Ok, so here’s the second half of the William Gibson Weekend story. Told as a Thursday Thirteen, because that way I can kill two birds with one stone.

Signed copy
  1. That same night, there was a multi-author reading, titled “Encounters”, on the Mainstage. Six authors were on the docket, though one couldn’t make it.
  2. Quoting from the programme:
    Lawrence Hill and Linda Leith move characters through changing landscapes. Brenda Hasiuk, David Chariandy, and Marie-Claire Blais [who was the no-show, IIRC] gather intersecting characters in one space. William Gibson hooks these two ends of the spectrum and complicates it with virtual dimensions.

  3. They ran three authors, then had an intermission, followed by the last two authors. As things were getting set up I saw Gibson come in and sit in the audience, over the in corner.
  4. The first three authors read from their works: Linda Leith from The Desert Lake, David Chariandy from Soucouyant, and Brenda Hasiuk from Where the Rocks Say Your Name. All were interesting; I particularly liked Chariandy and Hasiuk.
  5. At the intermission, I went up onto the stage, and had a chat with David Chariandy, who is perhaps my age. He’s a professor of English at SFU (Simon Fraser, not San Francisco). He was polite and enthusiastic. I also told Brenda Hasiuk that I’d enjoyed her reading — her description of riding around a frontier town in a pickup truck rung true, and I could almost feel the fabric of the seatbelt as she read.
  6. After this I glanced down into the audience. William Gibson was still sitting there in his chair, and there was still no one around him. What the hell, I thought, and went down into the row in front of him. I introduced myself, told him I’d always enjoyed his work — I read Count Zero when I was fifteen or so, and it told me there was a whole new kind of science fiction, something I’d never read before. It hooked me.
  7. We had a brief chat, mostly centered on a) me trying not to say “OhmygodIloveyourwork” over and over again and b) how Gibson’s work has come closer and closer to the present.
  8. Consider: The Sprawl trilogy was set in what I assume would be the 2080s or so, given little hints in the narrative. The Bridge trilogy was probably closer to about 2030 or so, if I had to guess. But his two latest works — Pattern Recognition and Spook Country are set in the present. The past, in fact: Spook Country takes place in late 2006.
  9. Gibson made the point that, really, the world we live in now is at least as science-fictional as anything he’s come up with in his novels. Constant personal connectivity, the world-wide web and the Internet it overlays: it reads, in some ways, like something out of Neuromancer. Just add some hustlers and an unhealthy dose of street drugs.
  10. (True story: My sister bought me Ting Ting Djahe ginger candies for Christmas one year. They looked and tasted exactly as I’d expected from their description as Julius Deane’s candy of choice in Neuromancer.)
  11. Gibson was very gracious, and I sure hope I didn’t come across as a raving fanboy. He was very approachable, and I kind of wish I’d have stayed longer, talking, but I didn’t want to wear out my welcome. So I went back to my seat, and waited for intermission to end.
  12. McNally Robinson had a table set up, selling the books from the authors that night, so when he came up to read, Gibson just grabbed a copy of Spook Country off the table. He reads in a bit of a monotone, something I knew to expect from having seen him read on TV. What I wasn’t ready for, though, was his accent: soft and Southern. After all, we may claim him as a Canadian, but he was born in South Carolina and grew up in Virginia.
  13. And that’s my William Gibson story.

Whirlwind Weekend

This weekend I: saw, and had a brief chat with, William Gibson; did nage-no-kata with the head of the Canadian Grading Board for judo, and also had a brief intro to the first set of ju-no-kata; drew Darth Vader in Crayola crayon; and heard the cutest version of the ABC song I think I’ll ever hear.

Friday
I took the day off, since I wanted to be able to get to the reading at 2:30 PM. I left town about 11:30 AM, a little later than I meant to, but isn’t that always the way? Barreled down the highway, got into the city at about 1:15 PM or so, then made my way through the tail end of the noon rush to Portage Place. The reading was at the McNally Robinson bookstore on the main floor, in the little eatery there. I got into the store, and the food smelled so good. I regretted eating at McDonald’s in Portage, but I’d been hungry.

There weren’t any tables free. There were, however, quite a few tables with one person at them, and most of them looked like they were there for the reading. I was just trying to figure out who I was going to approach when two women got up from a table directly in front of the reading area and said they were leaving, and I could have their table if I wanted. Uh, yes. Thanks.

So I sat down, and the waiter came around, brought me a water and a menu. I ordered a root beer and waited. It was 2:00 PM, half an hour yet to go. A girl showed up, looking like she needed a seat, so I offered her a spot at my table. We chatted about writing for a while, then the reading began.

William Gibson and John Havelda
William Gibson (L) and John Havelda

Gibson read from his latest book, Spook Country, which I finished reading last week, and thoroughly enjoyed. It’s set in the present day; as he’s said in recent interviews, the present is pretty much science fiction these days. After he and the poet John Havelda did their readings, there was about a half an hour Q&A with the audience. Some good questions were asked, on the nature of language (both authors like to play with language; Gibson, after all, coined the term cyberspace back in nineteen-eighty-what-have-you, and Havelda is (IIRC) a Hungarian poet, raised in England, now living in Portugal with his Portugese wife), on the future of books, and the like. Afterwards I was one of the first in line, and I got my beat-up old copy of Mona Lisa Overdrive* signed by Gibson.

to be continued…

________

* I couldn’t find my copy of Neuromancer.

Bone

If you haven’t read Bone yet, you really should.

I won’t say any more*, because I should be writing my own zombie-lawyer epic, but here are passel of reviews.

* Except this: I didn’t want it to end. As I approached page 1200**, I found myself torn: I couldn’t wait to turn the page and see just how everyone was going to get out of this jam, but I wanted to pace myself, because I didn’t want to get to the ending. No matter how good an ending it was (and I feel it was just about perfect), it would still be The End. I wanted to stay with all of them—the Bone cousins, Thorn, Gran’ma Ben, the red dragon, even the stupid, stupid rat creatures—just a little longer.

It’s been almost forever since I read a book that made me feel that way.

** Yes. It’s a comic. Yes. It’s clear of 1300 pages long.

Lamb

Lamb, a novel by Christopher Moore.

The subtitle on this one is “The Gospel according to Biff, Christ’s childhood pal”, so right off you should know if you’re the type that will enjoy this story, or the kind that maybe shouldn’t pick it up. Me, I’m the type that would enjoy this story.

Having read Moore’s novel Coyote Blue years ago, I knew that he was funny. Apparently I’d forgotten how funny. I chortled all the way through this book (well, till I got to the last section, titled “The Passion”).

The story is largely concerned with the “missing years” of Christ’s life. Biff (whose real name is Levi bar Alphaeus) and Christ (whose real name is Joshua bar Joseph) grow up together, fall in love with the same girl (Mary the Magdalene, referred to here as “Maggie”), and have all kinds of adventures and misadventures together. When events conspire to put Maggie beyond their reach forever, Joshua and Biff saddle up and head off to the East, looking for the Wise Men that had showed up on the night of Josh’s birth.

They track down Balthasar, Melchior, and Gaspar, traipsing from Israel to Afghanistan, China, and India in the process, learning kung fu, Zen Buddhism, and Hindu asceticism along the way. (Well, Josh learns; Biff is more into the ladies, and he learns quite a few items from them, mostly related to the Kama Sutra.)

The story is packed with laughs, both overt and sly (at one point, Biff says to Josh, as they travel toward Damascus, “Well it’s not just going to come to you in a flash here on the Damascus road, Josh. That sort of thing doesn’t happen.”

As good as he is at telling the funny stuff, Moore doesn’t flinch when he tells the sad stories; the grim and gruesome parts of the tale are equally well-told. The Passion and the Crucifixion are especially heart-rending when told in the voice of a man forced to watch his closest friend die.

When I came to the epilogue, I found myself wishing there was more, much more. I think I’ll have to get some more Christopher Moore novels into my house.

Thirteen Literary Wonders

Inspired by Doug’s post on his favourite books, here are thirteen pieces of text that I read in school. Some I liked, some I didn’t.

    Ones I liked

  1. There were several Norse Myths in one of the readers that I had in about Grade Five or so. They were there as sort of a compare and contrast with a couple of Greek myths. The only one that I remember for sure being there was the myth of how Loki gave away–and then recovered–Idunn’s golden apples. To this day I still love the Norse myths. I think maybe it’s something about Ragnarok that draws me to them, the knowledge that someday, all the gods die.
  2. Mack Reynolds’ short story Burnt Toast features an interesting twist on the “sell your soul to the Devil” story. A man, desperate for money, is given this challenge by a demon: drink one of thirteen shots of liquor, one of which is spiked with poison. If you get the poison, I get your soul. For each drink that you fire back, you get an amount of money that goes up exponentially (the first glass is worth $100, the second $200, the third $400, and so forth). The man accepts the challenge, and keeps coming back for more. As the number of shot glasses dwindles, and the amount get higher, the tension mounts, until there’s only two glasses left. What comes next? Ask me nice and I might tell you. [edit: Apparently this story was first published in a 1955 Playboy. I read it in a reader at school. Really.]
  3. The only Shakespeare play I’ve ever read, to date, is Macbeth. It was all right. I watched the bloodless BBC version of it, and it was not all right. At the end, when Macduff holds Macbeth’s head aloft, it’s got red yarn hanging down from it.
  4. I much preferred George Orwell’s Animal Farm to its longer cousin, 1984. Then one day I was in a mountaineering store in Calgary, and there was a display of walking sticks. The ad campaign for them made me laugh: “Four legs good, two legs bad”.
  5. I know it sounds cheesy when people say things like “It really makes you appreciate what you have”, but for me, the book that this sentence applies to is One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich, by Solzhenitsyn.
  6. In the tenth grade, I read Ray Bradbury’s Martian Chronicles, and quite enjoyed it. Years later, someone compared my writing to Bradbury’s. Hmmm….
  7. Arthur Miller’s The Crucible had an impact on me. Especially Giles Corey’s death, off-scene, pressed by stones. His last words were “More weight”, and then he expired.
  8. When I was about nine years old, my mother, a former teacher, did an extended stint subbing in one of the junior high classes. They were reading Incredible Journey, and some of the students were complaining bitterly about having to read it. Mom brought home a copy for me, and I burned through it in a few days. The next time someone complained in class, she pointed out that her nine-year-old son had read it, and that apparently shut them up.
  9. There are several comix (actually, I suppose, they’re more accurately bandes dessinées) that I used to read during library period at my elementary/junior high school. It was a French immersion school, so we were encouraged (read forced) to read French books in the library. The loophole was that there was a hefty collection of Schtroumpfs and Astérix et Obélix comics in the library. There were a lot of jokes in the characters’ names in Astérix–the dog’s name, en français, was Idéfixe (in English, he goes by Dogmatix).
  10. Speak White by Michèle Lalonde, a poem about the oppression of the French language in North America (if I remember correctly). I took this in first-year university French.
  11. Not So Much

  12. Pretty much anything by Gabrielle Roy. She takes a long time to say… nothing. I suppose this might be an indictment of literature in general, but heaven help me, GR was, in my view, the queen of boring.
  13. Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World. I have friends who insist I should give it another shot, and I may yet. The story didn’t appeal to me the first time, though. Then again, it wasn’t till my second read of Dune that I got into the story…
  14. See Dick Run. My grandmother’s favourite story about me is that, once, to prove to someone that I could read (at the age of three), she had me read a Dick & Jane book. I read it cover to cover, closed it, and said, “Well, that was a stupid story.” And now I think everyone I’ve ever met knows that story.

Other 13ers:

Technorati: Thursday Thirteen

Censoring Dennis Lee?

…it just don’t pay to read the news.

CBC Arts: N.S. educators can’t see humour in ‘Bratty Brother’ poem

Reviewers of one of my favourite poems from my childhood–”The Bratty Brother” by Dennis Lee–are having issues with the poem’s inclusion in a book distributed to every first-grader in Canada to promote literacy.

The poem, “Bratty Brother”, is a violent poem and the humour of it escapes our reviewers. Some parents may also respond negatively to the poem…

Perhaps the reviewers need to read this poem as a child would, rather than as a litigation-fearing no-fun-allowed suit would.

Besides,

The poem is more than 30 years old and the poet himself says he’s had nothing but positive feedback from parents, who actually say the book helps kids with younger ‘bratty’ brothers understand that they aren’t the only ones having these problems.

Here is part of the poem, reproduced from memory:

I dumped the bratty brother
In the shark-infested sea,
By dusk the sea was empty
And the brat was home with me.

I wept, and hurled the bratty brother
Off the CN Tower;
He lolloped through the living room
In less than half an hour.

Of course, when I read it, I substituted “sister” for “brother”, as I have two sisters and not a single brother.

I mean really.  What’s next?  Do we ban “Alligator Pie” on the off-chance that someone loses a leg trying to snare some lunch?

Iron Sunrise

A while ago I read Accelerando by Charles Stross, a whirlwind tour of the solar system and beyond before, during, and after a Technological Singularity. It was an enjoyable read at a breakneck pace. So when I was in Chapters in Winnipeg, I picked up Iron Sunrise, which features a different Singularity and a different future. It was another enjoyable and breakneck read, though a couple things bothered me–Stross really likes his adverbs, and they had a tendency to stand out for me, for whatever reason; and the book is actually a sequel to his Singularity Sky, but I had to go online to find that out. Nowhere on the covers or inside the book is this little fact mentioned. Had it been, I probably would have picked up Singularity Sky instead. (Oh well. It’s not the first time I’ve started in the middle of a series; I read William Gibson’s Sprawl trilogy 2-1-3.)
Continue reading

Einstein biography for $3

Einstein book coverWent down to Forbidden Flavours tonight to buy my sister a birthday gift (shhh, nobody tell her), and I naturally went into the used bookstore in the back. They had copies of Greg Bear’s Eon and Eternity in there, but the book I ended up buying was Einstein: the Life and Times. Looks fascinating, but it’ll have to wait till I’m done the other books in my stack.

From the back cover:

Here is the real Einstein: The boy growing up in the Swiss Alps, the young man caught in an unhappy first marriage, the passionate pacifist who agonized over his role in the making of The Bomb, the indifferent Zionist who was asked to head the Israeli state, the physicist who believed in God. Here, too, are the modern giants who touched Einstein’s life: Franklin Roosevelt, Sigmund Freud, Madame Curie, and Ben-Gurion.

I’ve long been fascinated by Einstein, though I know relatively little about him. I know that his Nobel prize was not for relativity but for his work on the photoelectric effect; I know that he stubbornly refused to believe in the implications of quantum mechanics; and that’s about all. I’m looking forward to learning more, more, more.